Saturday, January 2, 2010

Steven Seagal’s Lawman | What Do You Want See In Future Episodes of Lawman

Songs from the Crystal CaveIs anyone else loving the shit out of Steven Seagal’s Lawman? “That’s right… Steven Seagal.” I just caught up on some older episodes and man there is just something entertaining about Steven Seagal as a real life ‘reserve’ sheriff. And I know what it is that makes this show so fun to watch. Seagal is a weirdo, that’s right he’s stSteven Seagal Collection: 4 Film Favorites - Under Siege / The Glimmer Man / Above the Law / Fire Down Belowrange. No one ever said that actors in general were everyday salt of the earth type people. They have to be kind of strange otherwise we wouldn’t want to watch them so much. According to Seagal he has been training dogs to fight since he was a child for ‘protection’. And in the episode where the lawman was working with a new dog, training him to attach along side another dog that Seagal has had since he was a pup, Seagal makes it a point to say that the dogs need to get used to him being aggressive towards a home invader. Then they ran through an exercise where Seagal, and his two German Sheppard’s collectively attack one of the dog trainers. It wasn’t exactly the perfect display of a man/beast killing machine but it was still fun to watch.
Steven Seagal Collection: 4 Film Favorites - Under Siege / The Glimmer Man / Above the Law / Fire Down BelowThere is another thing which is very funny about Seagal’s interactions with the community that he helps police. Every time he and his crew of geriatric auxiliary police officers pull over an African America man, once the detainee recognizes Seagal they always insist that they don’t like his movies but some old female family member does. “My grandma she loves you”, “My wife… she loves your movies, she has them all”, I take it that older African-American women have a real Steven Seagal fetish. Maybe, it is just a way for the people he pulls over to bust his balls a bit, or there is a secret society of elderly African-American women dedicated to the film catalogue of Steven Seagal. These are the things that keep us coming back and watching more of the Lawman in action. Who knows what else will be revealed about the mysterious Steven Seagal by this show?

Fire Down Below/Out for Justice/On Deadly GroundWhat we would like to see in future episodes of Lawman:
• Mr. Seagal in a firefight with an armed assailant
• Mr. Seagal getting into an unarmed fight with an assailant
• Mr. Seagal running after an assailant
• Here more weird stories from his past, in particular the one about him getting into a fight with Jean-claude van dam at Sylvester Stallone’s house back in 1997 (It happened people and I want to hear about it)
• Steven Seagal’s family, is anyone else interested in seeing his family, he always says that he is a family man but we have only seen his dogs. Are his dogs the family he is talking about? Or, this is our theory… every member of his family has a ponytail, and that’s why they won’t show them on the show, I’m sure of it. Hopefully a future episode will confirm these suspicions of a ponytail filled family tree.

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